"The Book of Me, Written by You" - What do you treasure?

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations.

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf

The prompt for the week is:    

What do you treasure?

The Brief:

This week I am leaving the prompt wide open.

• You choose on what you treasure, the things, the people, 
• The things that are not seen, 
• The things that are seen yet not obviously treated as a treasure.

Treasure's can be found as long as you are looking. They also change over time.

When I was growing up and into my early 20's, I considered it a treasure if I could find myself in a job and had nice things around me. The higher the position the better. However, what is even better is the truth and respect. If you don't have either of these, then you have nothing.

My husband and I

In my 30's this had changed. It went to have to work to create a better life for my family, meaning my husband and our future children. It would also give us those children as they weren't "arriving" we we thought they would. In fact, we had to pay professionals to help us after loosing two children. These children were not born, but they were confirmed as pregnancies. One aborted by itself and one had to be taken, so my life could go on. I treasure each and every day I spent with each of these.

2003 One of our children who were never born

By my mid-30's, I learned to treasure the memories of people that were once in my life - my paternal grandmother, my paternal uncle, my children I never got to hold. Also, those who accept me as I am - my husband and nieces. Although those said nieces don't realize how much for them I did when they were growing up and am starting to realize they never will know, which is sad. The reactions they have had when they were growing up influenced my life and they don't even realize it. My husband and I discussed and looked at alternatives to having children - fostering? maybe but do we want to, adoption? I don't want to ever be told no because your not MY mother ever again, medical treatment like IVF? Maybe but that requires money we just don't have.

Jackie who we lost in 2012 and Buddy who keeps me company today

Now in my 40's, I'm almost resigned to never having children which makes those two we nearly had even more of a treasure. My husband's a treasure for being here with me and dealing with this. I treasure my dog, Buddy, because he knows when I just need those cuddles and kisses. I recently have found cousins - 1st, 2nd and even more cousins than I knew. I'm starting to cherish what we have in common and forge relationships with each and every one of them.

Lesson in life still pretty much remains the same - if you have the following in your life, you are richer than you'll ever know:

• Truth 
• Respect
• People who love you for who you are
• Love (remember this can range) for people who are in your life and who have given you and you ancestors life
• Pets can give you so much
• Children are more precious than gold

If you can make enough money to survive, and have what's outlined above, then you are your own king of your own castle and you have everything.  Think of the movie The Castle...

  Check back for the continuation of "The Book of me, Written by You" series.    

"The Book of Me, Written by You" - Love

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations.

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf

The prompt for the week is:    

Love

The Brief:

• Love comes in varying shapes and sizes
• I love you
• I love ice cream
• I love the smell of rain, Spring, toast
• I love my (insert your family member, pet etc)
• There is no right or wrong way to love....or is there?
• Define what love means to you.

Love is a 4 letter word that can and to some does mean so much more than a 4 letter word. It means a variety of things from loving a song, colour, a food, a thing, a place, a pet and a person just to name a few of them. It also revolves over your lifetime as well. Something you love when you are aged 10 changes and as you grow some of the things you love drop off once you reach the age of 40, while others stay there but there are different types of love each of which has a different level of importance.

As I group these into types, remember these are MY types and levels and not everyone will feel the same way.

Hobbies & Everyday Items Type - Lowest

2 of my running trophies before I had to stop

The lowest type of "love" are for hobbies and everyday items such as chocolate, ice cream, shoes, songs, etc. These are the things we do love but if they ever went away, while we would feel the loss, it wouldn't bring you to your knees. Further, these are the items I'm talking about when I say love drops off and evolves overtime. Other types of love do this, but this is more frequent in this group. For instance, when I was under 15 years old, I loved to run. I would run to school and then run home...just to run. However, once I had injured first my back and then my knee and ankles, I still
loved to run, but just couldn't do it any longer. Do I love to run? You bet, but I can't. Another form would be chocolate and ice cream. I love both, but I have to regulate how much I eat, so I can't eat as much as I want (or else I'd get sick if nothing else!). I could survive without them, and I have done so in the past when I needed to regulate my sugar, however, I wouldn't want to go without. Besides, as I'm sitting here writing this article up, I'm eating some dark chocolate baking bits. YUM!

When you discover a new hobby or item, such as a new food you tried, and when you experience it or accomplish something is when you feel true love of this type.

Pets & Friends Type - Medium

This is in the middle as we have very close friends and some friends that we haven't seen in awhile, but the fact remains if they were to go away or die we'd feel a more severe heart ache because we do love them. The same goes for pets. Some people have pets and they go outside to feed and give them a quick pet. Whereas others, like myself, consider them family and they are a member of the family. When something happens to them, we have the same severe (or maybe even more so) than loosing a close friend. An example would be my friend Brian Sherry VanLeuven. I knew him from school and considered him a friend; however, when we lost him in 2013, it hurt and I was sad to know someone that young is gone. Another example would be when we lost our dogs JR (2004) and Jackie (2012). They were both our dogs, but JR was under 3 years old and Jackie as over 10 years old. They both hurt, but Jackie we let go due to diabetes complications as it was the thing to do. JR I still think of and mourn for but Jackie I am sad but know he's in a better place. 

During better times, you have when you first meet the friend or pet or parties or celebrations for them are some examples of these times.

Family Type - High

Unfortunately, we only have one of these which for some people is a good thing and for some people is a bad thing. However, how much everyone within that family fights and doesn't get along with they are still joined by common genes, people and views on basic levels. Believe me, I don't have the closest of families, and have never even had a reunion or gathering because World War 3 would probably be a safer place, but we all still have the same genes and basic views on most things (please notice the world MOST). 
 

Some family at my uncle's funeral

While I put the word most in there, there are sometimes very few things families look at the same way whereas sometimes you cannot mistaken they are family because they have the same outlook on all things. For instance, my father's a Republican and sends me (who's a Democrat for the most part) jokes about things against the Democrats. At first I told him not to send me those things, but he didn't take any notice of me. At first I was ticked off and annoyed, but rather than getting upset, I just delete them now. However, the fact is we both have strong views in politics, which is a common thing and that's ok. Another is my brother, myself and my nieces feel strongly about family and how close they should be. And if anyone in the family needed anything, we would help out as much and where we could and nothing would stop us. An example would be when my niece needed help after the hurricanes visited her multiple times in 2005. They needed a bit of help to get them up and going again, and my nieces took up a collection for her to help them out, which it did. It wasn't much but it was all we could do to help them out and they were very thankful. 

Some good examples of this type are parties, celebrations, births and weddings are when you see each other during the better times.

Spouse/Partner & Children Type - Extremely High

This type are the people you are in direct contact with day in and out. If something happens to them, your whole world feels like it comes crashing down on you. This is the extreme love where your chest feels like its going to kill you because it hurts so much. I know all about the children loss when I didn't have a choice to have surgery because our baby was in the wrong spot in 2004. Your whole world just stops spinning and you just feel completely and utterly numb. Every day you think about the person - even if its just something small or in passing but it reminds you of the loss. True over the years the loss feels less but its still constantly with you no matter what.

1997 My husband's family at our wedding

Marriage, commitment or baptism ceremonies are probably the best examples of these types of good things in these types.


As you can see by my chart, there are different levels and types. They do vary but if they all still hurt when it comes to death or disassociation from them. On the other hand, which I don't think I've mentioned enough in this article, when you feel the love with these types its the best at the same time.


  Check back for the continuation of "The Book of me, Written by You" series.